


The View From Heaven

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Angst, Canon, Drama, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-10-24
Updated: 2005-10-24
Packaged: 2018-12-27 10:49:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12079551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: In order for this to make sense you must know that this is an alternate universe where Ethan, Stockwell and Brianâ€™s firing never existed. However Justin did intern at Vanguard. This is about 4 years after Cowlipâ€™s season 3.Brian's Death takes a severe toll on Justin. Can he learn to live and love again?





	The View From Heaven

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

_Justin and Brian were walking down the street, peacefully enjoying an autumn day. Justin loved autumn because of the many colors the leaves became when the colder weather started to move in and the trees began their process of hibernation. Things couldn’t have been better. It was a perfect day, with his perfect man, nothing could bring him down from this cloud. Nothing at all could ruin this for him._

_“I’m going to fuck you to death,” Brian whispered, nibbling at Justin’s ear._

_Justin laughed. “Can we get home first?”_

_“I’d do you hear in the street damn it, I want you bad.”_

_Justin grinned and blushed a little as Brian continued to fondle him as they walked the street toward the loft on Tremont. The wind blew a little and the leaves rustled with it. Justin took a deep breath and inhaled the scent of the season he loved so much._

_There were footsteps behind them running. Justin turned in time to see Hobbs point a gun at him and fire. He closed his eyes and waited to be struck but nothing happened. Had Hobbs missed? He opened one eye and when he did he saw Hobbs gone, and Brian on the ground at his feet._

_Justin could feel dread in his chest and tears begin to form in his eyes as he bent down to his fallen love and took him into his arms. He looked into the older man’s hazel eyes and could already see the life leaving them. Brian lifted his hand and touched Justin’s cheek, wiping the tears away with his thumb. The younger man removed his scarf and applied it to the wound in Brian’s gut._

_“Hold on baby, just hold on… I love you,” Justin sobbed barely coherently._

_Brian smiled weakly at him, his eyelids drooping slightly as his life drained away. “I… love you…”_

_“No Brian… no good byes, not yet! You’ll be okay. You’re going to be fine. Just hold on.”_

_Brian’s eyes slid closed and his body went slack in Justin’s arms. The blonde screamed at the top of his lungs, begging Brian to wake up, crying and pleading but Brian didn’t regain consciousness. Justin kept trying and begging, shaking the older man, but he did not stir. Justin cried out one more time as sirens wailed in the distance. Brian Kinney was dead._

 

Justin sat up in bed with a yelp and realized that there were no sirens. It was his alarm clock. Not his, but Brian’s. He climbed out of bed, turning it off and heading to the bathroom. He looked in the mirror. His face was paler than it had ever been and he had dark bags under his eyes from lack of sleep. He sighed deeply and stepped into the shower, sobbing softly as he washed his hair and body remembering Brian, and how he had been gone for a year and a half. 

After his shower he headed to the kitchen to make some coffee, but he was out and sighed deeply as he headed back into the bedroom to get dressed. There was a knock on the door and he sighed, going to answer it, just in his pants.

“Yes?” he said impatiently to the stranger outside his loft.

“Hey I just moved in downstairs, my name’s Lane… I was wondering if I could use your phone fast, it will be a couple days before mine turns on.”

Justin eyed him, and moved out of the way to let the guy use the phone. “It’s over there.”

After the new neighbor was finished with the use of the phone he smiled and looked at Justin. While, using the phone the guy scoped out the loft like it was a museum. Justin just rolled his eyes at it and stood bye the door.

“Nice place, I like your kitchen,” Lane commented.

Justin winced remembering his own words the first time Brian had brought him here. When Brian died, unknown to Justin, his will had been completely made over and Justin was the soul beneficiary with a chunk of Brian’s fortune stashed away for Gus. Though the rest was rightfully Justin’s, he wrote a big check to Debbie and paid Michael’s rent for the rest of his life on the comic store. Those were Brian’s instructions and Justin was more than happy to oblige to them.

Justin got an evil smirk. “You look like you could use a break.”

“I’m kind of tired of moving yeah,” Lane said.

Justin stripped and Lane watched in awe. “So are you cumming or going? Or cumming and then going? Or cumming and staying?”

 

Justin appeared at the diner a little later the usual, to the assembly that had been there every morning since before he’d become part of the group. He sat down in the usual booth with a just fucked glow to his cheeks. Michael looked at the guys and sighed as Justin smiled at all of them deviously.

“Yo Deb… coffee?” Justin said, holding the cup up to her.

She rolled her eyes at him and he scoffed.

“So it looks like you’re fresh and fucked already this morning,” Emmett mused.

Justin smiled. “New neighbor.”

Michael shook his head. “So how was he?” 

“I’ve had better.”

It was then when Justin looked up to coax Debbie again he saw the guy Lane sitting in the end booth. Justin smirked and looked at the guys, smiling before grabbing his coat and heading to the ‘Vette and off to work as Art Director at Vanguard. 

Cynthia was waiting for Justin when he arrived with a Starbuck’s cup in his hand and portfolio in the other, he gave her a look and she followed him into his office. 

“The new partner starts today, Vance is bringing him around to meet everyone.” She said, handing him his schedule for the day.

Cynthia had worked for Brian since before she could remember and when he died she was more than happy to continue her position with his partner. She found that working for Justin was just about the same as working for Brian it just was a different job being the art director’s assistant. 

“He certainly didn’t waste anytime replacing Brian did he,” Justin mumbled into his cup. “Cyn, take these to Madison, I fixed his team’s fuck ups for the Epson account.”

She took the boards and nodded, shutting the door behind her and walking right into Gardner Vance. 

“Taylor here yet?” he asked her.

“He’s here, but now is probably not a good time,” She said, nodding the man about Brian’s age who was standing with Vance. 

He shrugged and went into the office anyway. Cynthia sighed and walked off. The younger man followed Vance into Justin’s office where he sat, looking over some boards and sipping his coffee. Vance knocked on the door that was already opened.

“Generally you knock before coming in,” Justin said sarcastically.

“Taylor, this is Lane Matthews, the new Partner. Lane, this is Justin Taylor, the Art Director.” Vance introduced the man.

Justin swallowed and looked up, and came face to face with this mornings trick. He tried to play it cool and sat back in his chair the way Brian used to when he knew he was trouble but ready to be the defensive player. A small smirk spread across his boyish features.

“I’ve heard a lot about your work Mr. Taylor,” Lane complimented. “I hear you’re the best in the country.”

“More like best in the world, but flattery will get you no where.” Justin sneered.

Vance took that moment as a good exit and took Lane off to meet other employees. Justin sat back in his chair and sighed heavily. He looked at Cyn who looked at him knowing exactly what that was all about. She brought him some Motrin for his headache she could see coming a mile away.

“I think I’m going to head out for the day.”

She nodded.

 

Later that evening Justin returned home and was blissfully in the middle of fucking the brains out a nice trick he picked up at Babylon when there was a loud pounding on his door. This noise interfered with his concentration so he got up and walked over, still naked and tossing the used condom in the trash and opened the door. 

“What?” he growled, seeing Lane on the other side.

“So all I was was a fucking trick?” Lane barked.

“That’s right, I told you right off I don’t do boyfriends, one night, one time, I don’t fuck the same guy twice,” He looked back toward the bedroom. “Now if you’ll excuse me… I have a guest.”

Lane stormed off in a rage and Justin shrugged, going back to his trick and fucking him until he couldn’t stay awake, then kicked the trick out. He lay there, staring at the ceiling a good hour, just sobbing and smelling Brian on the sheets. He’d tried to fuck the smell out but no matter how many tricks he fucked, Brian’s Armani cologne and scent after sex was permanently engrained into the sheets and the duvet. Before long he’d cried himself to sleep. 

“God damn it Brian, why did you have to fucking leave me?” he sobbed. 

The next morning Justin didn’t really feel like getting out of bed. He just wanted to lie there and breathe in Brian. After a good 10 extra minutes of just laying in the bed, he finally got up, showered and went to the diner, he took his usual seat in the booth with the guys and sighed deeply.

“Deb, I’m kind of in a hurry, can I get some coffee,” he said.

She poured his cup wordlessly and went about serving the other customers. He gave all the guys a quick ‘what the fuck’ glance and watched as she walked to the back booth and talked to Lane. He sighed deeply and threw money on the table for the coffee he didn’t touch and headed out of the diner. Michael followed.

“Hey Justin, slow down,” he called after the blonde. 

Justin stopped and lit a cigarette.

“What’s that about?” Michael asked concerned.

“I fucked that guy your mom’s gabbing too. Turns out he’s Brian’s replacement at Vanguard and he’s going to be my stalker. The jerk lives in my building too.” Justin ranted. 

Michael laughed.

“What!” Justin snapped. “What is so damn funny?”

“Just sounds familiar that’s all,” Michael teased.

“I wasn’t nearly as pathetic and I never turned Brian’s friends against him. This dude is like Brian’s age when I met him… I was 17 and a virgin. If it happened now I wouldn’t act like a pathetic faggot.”

“Not everyone’s like that,” Michael reasoned.  
Justin took a long drag of his cigarette. “Doesn’t matter, I’m probably taking that position in New York.”

Michael frowned. “Fine go to New York have fun being Brian!”

“That’s funny coming from the guy who wanted me gone from day one!”

“When I saw how happy you made Brian I changed my mind!”

“Brian’s dead.”

“So I can’t still be your friend? Wish you’d told me that a year and a half ago, I wouldn’t have wasted my time!”

Justin sighed and took another long drag. “Look I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“Everyone here is starting to hate me.”

“Because you’re becoming the old Brian.”

Justin looked at him. “I can’t stay here anymore there… there are too many memories.”

Michael nodded and hugged the younger man comfortingly. Justin hugged back and felt himself begin to sob on Michael’s shoulder. They hadn’t shared this up until after Brian’s death and Michael really began to be there for Justin. And Justin was there for Michael. There friendship grew more in an ironic way with their major obstacle gone. Brian Kinney.

“I’ll call.” Justin finally choked out.

Michael nodded. “You better.”

“And I’ll pay for you guys to come and visit whenever you want.”

“I’ll tell everyone.”

Justin gave Michael one more quick hug before going off to work. 

 

When he arrived at the office, Cynthia was waiting with a message from the new boss. He sighed heavily and when he read the words “no use trying to avoid me, we do live in the same building”. Great, he had a stalker. He sighed knowing that he would eventually have to face Lane at some point and he put his stuff down in his office and headed toward Lane’s prepping for any reaming he would receive.

Lane told him to sit, so he did, sitting across from him in the man’s office.

“The first thing I want you to know is that I in no way plan to let my personal feelings enter into the business.” Lane said.

“Personal feelings… whatever do you mean?” Justin mocked. “If you fire me for using you as a trick fine, its your loss, you won’t find anyone better than me at my job in the country.”

“I don't plan on firing you, Mr. Taylor. That is my point. The fact that you used me like a personal sex toy will not enter this building again. I wanted you to understand that.”

“Then why are we having this conversation?” Justin snapped.

“I tried to talk to you when you were home but... that didn't go over well if you remember,” Lane said calmly.

“Yeah I was busy then,” Justin smirked in the memory and walked out heading to Vance’s office and storming in without knocking. “I am so close to quitting right now…”

Vance looked at him questioningly. “Why?”

Justin was seriously pissed. “That bitch you hired to replace Brian!”

“Funny, I thought you'd like him considering they have almost the same personality.”

“Funny, I don't and Brian I weren't together because of his fantastic way with people... now I'm not dealing with him.”

“I'm afraid you'll have to deal with him, Mr. Taylor. He's the major shareholder in the company. I didn't hire him, he was gracious enough not to buy me out completely.”

“Then consider this my two weeks notice,” Justin started to leave.

“Taylor....”

“What?”

“Give him some time. He's quite brilliant. And I'm sure you, meaning both of you, just got off on the wrong foot. Take the time to get to know him before you decide, please. Replacing you will be a bitch.” 

“Well I guess that’s up to Mr. Matthews isn’t it? Anyone will be willing to hire me Gardner, not only is my experience from the top agency in the state but, its from the guy who made it that way.”

“I'll make you a deal.” 

“What?”

“At the end of the two weeks, if you still want to quit, you can leave. But if you think you can tolerate him, you can stay. You don't have to write me a formal letter of resignation until the end of the two weeks and you can backdate it to today's date. And, for your information, Mr. Matthews left the hiring and firing aspect up to me so by quitting you'll be screwing me over, not him.”

“You said he was the major shareholder, I'm fucking his company.”

With that Justin left the office of Gardner Vance and went to his own. He sat down on desk and looked at the letter he received from Kenny and Rogers (lol) agency in New York City a week ago asking him to join their team as their art director for a better salary than he was getting at Vanguard. He looked it over again and called Cynthia into his office.

“Yeah Justin?” She asked walking in.

“Are you able to relocate?” he asked her sincerely.

She shrugged. “Yeah I could if I wanted.”

“Want to move to New York?”

 

Six months passed quickly for Justin in his new career at Kenny and Roger’s agency. He adapted to New York life well from his years of living with Brian prepared him for the lifestyle. The Big Apple and Justin Taylor were a fine match. He fell in love with the city that never sleeps almost from first entrance into his new place. Though it hurt to watch the loft go to someone else, he knew that this was part of the process called moving on. 

He was in his office doing some work on fixing screw ups by his new team when there was a knock on his door.  
“It’s open,” Justin said not looking up.

Jordan, the new newest intern at K and R peaked his head in. He was a kid about the age of Justin when he started internship at Vanguard, with brown hair and brown eyes but just about gorgeous enough to tackle there and then.

“Mr. Taylor, the new partner is here to see you,” he said.

“Okay Jordan, send him in.” Justin said standing to greet his new boss.

When Lane walked into the office Justin thought he felt his heart stop in his chest. It was like he was being followed. Haunted by an old trick. Now he knew what Brian felt like when he tagged along and basically stalked him all those years ago when they first met, when they didn’t have a relationship, where Brian tried to avoid him and Justin wouldn’t be pushed away.

“Taylor, a pleasure to see you again.” Lane said sincerely. “Before you say anything I want to apologize for my behavior in Pittsburgh. I hope you can start a new with a good professional relationship.”

“What the fuck are you doing, are you my personal stalker or something?” Justin felt like yelling.

“What?” Lane looked stunned.

“I move to New York, away from my family and friends to get away from you, but you show up here anyway. This is unbelievable.” Justin was losing control now. 

Before Lane could say anything Justin was gone, he went to the stairs, not waiting for the elevator and headed for the parking garage. He found himself passing near the open ledge of the garage near his car, chain smoking and wishing in vein all this shit would stop. This Lane crap was ridiculous. He finally got into his car and sighed desperately and seeing the bottle of sleeping pills prescribed by the doctor he picked up at lunch, sitting there dauntingly in the passenger seat.

Lane came out, deciding to go home an hour early today. He walked up to his car and saw Justin in the Corvette that was parked next to him. Lane took a closer look at his coworker and former sex partner and noticed him sleeping on the steering wheel. He knocked softly on the window but Justin did not stir. He knocked harder. Justin still didn’t respond. He tried the door and when it open Justin tumbled out, unconscious into his arms. He checked the blonde’s pulse. It was racing and by this time he was barely breathing. He cursed not knowing what had happened, so he called an ambulance. 

“Hold on Justin, helps coming.” He said, pulling Justin out of the seat and laying him on the ground. Lane then took off his coat and put it under Justin’s head.

He looked into the car to see what the Art Director had done. That’s when he came by the empty bottle of sleeping pills. He looked at it and then at Justin then back at the bottle.

“Oh Justin, why didn’t you ask me for help…”

Lane looked up from the bottle when he heard sirens coming toward him.


End file.
